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When something negative or that you don't like happens to you, it changes how you feel. Not only do you have to deal with what happened, but also with your reaction toward it. You may be faced with a version of yourself that you don't want to see. One that says you are not good enough and that you can't succeed in life. You may feel guilty or ashamed for what happened, or you have no doubt that this is your fault. Perhaps you have so much anger or sadness that you cannot move forward. There are moments in life when you get stuck. Something so big happens to you that it knocks you down and puts you out of the game. You want it to go away, and you decide after processing the situation that you will let it go. But you don't know how. Loving yourself in this moment of your life is the first step. You should let it go because you deserve to be free to continue your life. Whatever is going on shouldn't determine the rest of your life. Nothing has to change for you to be all right. You can be well within the chaos and in the middle of the problems. This is an essential realization because we usually don't think this is possible. It is complicated to let go of something you are judging and analyzing all the time. The thoughts of what happened keep coming to your mind, and it may seem impossible to disconnect from them. You cannot disconnect because you haven't decided to let it go. The power of forgiveness, of yourself or others, can help you release the burden you carry and let go of it. You don't have to change the external circumstances you are facing. You have to change the way you see yourself in relation to them.  It may seem difficult to believe that in the most challenging circumstances, you can still Love yourself. Is in those moments when you need to accept yourself, and the mistakes you think you made and be at peace with yourself. Self-Love will give you more power to change the circumstances than criticism, judgment, and guilt. You shouldn't make yourself suffer. Try instead to support yourself to overcome what you are facing. It may require practice, but the best way out of anything is to choose to Love yourself no matter what happens. Take care of yourself with understanding and kindness. You may not be used to supporting yourself when the present and future don't look promising, but your life can change at any moment if you allow it to happen. Yes, life happens, and you can lose yourself. But loving yourself to the fullest will help you stay calm and reconnect with a joyous future. Put your attention on your state of being, in reconnecting with who you are and your power, before trying to fix any other detail of your life. Love will save you in any given circumstance. Love comforts you, understands you, forgives you, and is always caring and kind to you. This Love doesn't come from outside; it comes from within yourself. You have the power to create Love and to use it to transform your life and the lives of others. No other force is more important than Love, the Love for yourself. It will take you to the highest levels possible and rescue you when you fall. Love is there for you. Always there. "When we are experiencing immeasurable pain, fear, and sorrow, when we are vulnerable and tender, that is the very time to turn toward experience rather than to escape it. It is the very time when we most need acceptance; when
we most need Love. To Love then, as it is meant here, is to remain fully present, with self and others, when difficult internal conditions arise" Robyn D. Walser
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Many people sabotage their lives by doubting themselves because they fear making mistakes. Me included! I understand your fear of taking risks or worrying about the idea that something can go wrong unexpectedly. Maybe you don’t believe in yourself because of something that happened to you in the past. It is you who made that decision and ended up in trouble, made that mistake that complicated your life enormously, or the one who said or did something that created great pain. You feel guilty or maybe ashamed. You blame yourself. You look backward and punish yourself for not doing things differently. It is totally unfair! You can judge yourself all you want, but sadness is the only thing you will get out of it. It is the moment to accept whatever happened, give yourself permission to be human and err, and decide to move forward. It is easy to stop believing in yourself when you have accumulated bad experiences. You can be your own worst enemy and plant the seed of self-doubt. You will suffer the consequences when that plant grows within you with solid roots. You will second-guess yourself and all your decisions. You will follow others’ opinions instead of relying on yourself and your judgment. You will look for external approval. There is wisdom within you, and it is more powerful than you imagine. This is the reason why you need to believe in yourself.  You can keep looking at what went wrong or what you didn’t do well. It is your choice to do so. But I suggest that you look ahead and start believing in yourself instead. It takes the same energy from you to believe in yourself than to doubt yourself. Changing the opinion you have about yourself is a matter of focusing on different things. If you want to see how strong, resourceful, resilient, and wise you are, you will find lots of proof of that in your experiences. But if you decide instead that you are incapable, you don’t have talent, you are less than others, or you are not good enough, I am sure you can justify that, too. If it was you who made those wrong decisions that you consider mistakes, it is also you who can transform your life by doing things differently, learning, getting better, or choosing another way of living. Your intention is the key element to creating a different life. It is necessary that you accept your past and make peace with it. You can add forgiveness to your life to liberate yourself from the past. Understand that the past should remain in the past. You build your new life from here, in the present. How do you start believing in yourself? Through Love. A Love for yourself that is so intense that it allows you to let go of any negative ideas about yourself. Remember that loving yourself is a choice. It is not something that simply happens. It requires action. You can bring it into your life, and you can cultivate it. This Love for yourself is your power, which will take you wherever you want. Your confidence doesn’t come from being perfect and having everything under control but from a connection with your inner wisdom and the Source. Divine guidance, inspiration, and intuition are all available for you. You can be helped, guided, and supported. First, you need to believe in yourself, and then the certainty you seek will appear. Not the other way around. Trust yourself and the Universe. You are one of a kind. See your brilliance, and this will be the power that will sustain your belief in yourself. "Encourage yourself, believe in yourself, and Love yourself.
Never doubt who you are" Stephanie Lahart We all have experienced traumatic events in our lives. Not only do big things happen, like a sudden loss, illness, or a breakup. Sometimes difficulties can come in little pieces that, by accumulation, make us feel overwhelmed, out of balance, and unable to connect with joy. Constant pressure at work, problems in relationships, financial stress, physical pain… who is not living at least one of these situations or something similar? When it seems that it is too painful to feel what is happening in our lives, we want to make it disappear. We often tell everyone we are all right, but we feel miserable and carry on with our lives the best way we can. We try to avoid facing all we don’t want to feel because we believe the problem is too big. We run away from the fear, heartache, or pain, we intensely feel. But it is stored in our minds and bodies, and reappears from time to time. There are strategies to go through these periods when things feel like more than we can face. Observe yourself and see if you are using any escape mechanism or are distracting yourself, to avoid facing the life situations you have in front of you. Is it working? What will help you resolve your problems, in the long run, is connecting with your body and the pain it stores, and investigating the story you have in your mind about these events. Approach it, even if it is little by little. And then allow all of it to be released. Maybe you have been controlling the pain for many years, trying to be sure it doesn’t reappear on the surface of your life. Perhaps you locked it away a long time ago in a safety box and thought you would never have to see it again. But whatever is affecting you, even if it is very old pain, will not disappear because you ignore it; just the opposite. The more you ignore it, the harder it will try to get to you. Love yourself enough to help yourself to heal.  Soothe yourself, be kind and understanding towards yourself, and nurture yourself, if you want to support yourself in your healing. But what happens when our lives don’t go as we want or we face serious problems? We tell ourselves: it is my fault. Doing that adds pain to what we are already experiencing. We dislike who we are or our life, because we blame ourselves for not knowing how to resolve the situation we are in. Now we have two problems: the inner sense of shame, guilt, or frustration, plus the pain we are experiencing. Become aware of what is happening to you. Do it, but don’t inflict more pain on yourself. To resolve any challenge in life, the first step is to add more Love to the situation. Love includes the acceptance of whatever is happening, the time to process it, the releasing, the forgiveness, the treating yourself with care, the asking for help if it is necessary. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Be your own friend, not your enemy. There is no problem big enough that it cannot be solved with more Love towards yourself and your life. Love is a great cure for situations of all kinds. Help yourself to go through tough times. Healing is a process. We all have thorns stuck in our hearts, hurts, and disappointments. Love is a powerful force and your ally in facing pain. Whatever you want to change in your life, it can be transformed. But the solution to face the pain you are looking for is not out there, but inside yourself. The more you trust your goodness and innate power and connect with them, the faster you will be able to resolve what you are facing and move forward. You cannot make the events that happened to you disappear, but you can give yourself the opportunity to use them to transform yourself and become more resilient and stronger. Remember that, like the Phoenix Bird, you have within you the power of regeneration and wherewithal to heal and be new again. ”To heal is to touch with love that which we previously touched with fear”
Stephen Levine A new beginning sounds like something exciting, better than the reality we are living. We wait for the beginning of the year, the month, or Monday, to start new things and to make commitments with ourselves. It is as if these dates in the calendar have an extraordinary power to take us further and help us achieve our goals better than any other moment. But time and the partition of it into days, weeks, and months is just an agreement that humans have. You perceive how time passes and count the days, but every breath you take is a new beginning. Every second of your life is a moment for renewal, transformation, and change. I invite you to live your life with the perspective that there is something new in front of you every time you look at it. A situation doesn’t have to change to be new; you are the one that creates the change by looking at it from a different perspective. Look at your partner or child with fresh eyes. Look at the smiles you receive, at the Love that exists. Look at the tree near your house. Look deeply at its beauty. See its new leaves or the ones that have been lost. Look at the same view you enjoy and allow yourself to perceive the little things you have never seen before. I don’t have any idea about what your life is like. What you are going through now may seem difficult and overwhelming. Still, when you accept the situation and surrender to it, asking for guidance and help, it gets transformed into something totally different. You cannot change this moment, or the past, but you can transform your view and opinion of it. Whatever is happening to you, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually is here, let’s not deny it. But you can complain, feel sorry for yourself, think that any time past was better, or you can believe that the future, your next breath, will bring something much better.  It is you who has the power to transform your reality and create a new one. And you have everything you need inside of yourself to do it. You were born fully equipped to create new beginnings. Once you see reality as it is, it stops scaring you. It is what it is, but you can be directed to the right solution, guided into a better place, or help can unexpectedly arrive to you. Your circumstances can be like passing clouds. The storm will end. You can overcome anything you are facing and make it even better than it was before. Create a new beginning in the relationship with yourself, send Love to your body, be kinder and less judgmental with yourself. Invest in yourself and your life by connecting with your power, the voice of your inner wisdom, and doing something to create the new beginning you desire in your life. One baby step is enough for today. Begin with deciding what you want more of in your life. Is it more Love, health, friends, wealth, time, a partner? There is no need to make a plan on how to achieve any of those things. You have a more critical task: surrender. Do it right now. Accept where you are and stop judging reality. Play with the idea that you can have plenty of new relationships, a promotion, find the resources you need, a new home, or whatever you have been looking for. There is only one major requirement: you need to believe that what you say you want can be yours. Take a look for the last time at the life you have and begin a new one you will create with what you have right now. Walk into the new life you have decided to live. Nothing has changed, I know. But everything will look transformed because of your commitment to living differently. Start believing in yourself and the power of the Universe to support you. Your burning desire, your intention, your Love for yourself, and all the energy of who you are will be your way to transform everything. You have the power. This is all it takes: You. “Nothing in the universe can stop you from letting go and starting over”
Guy Finley Are you aware of what you say and how you say it? Maybe when you are preparing for a presentation, or you want to impress someone you care about, you choose your words carefully and decide to be the most likable version of yourself. But admit it, most of the time, you don’t pay much attention to the energy behind your words, your tone of voice, or how it will affect others when you express yourself with anger, say mean things, or scream at your child or partner. Unmindful speech is widespread. Speaking with Love means becoming aware of your speech and consciously choosing words that can create hope, confidence, joy, and Love. Tomorrow, say something nice to someone, but not as an obligation, to look good, cheer up the other person, or to motivate an employee. Say it because you feel it. Because these words you are pronouncing come from your heart and are part of your nature. Remember, it is free to add some Love to your speech. Really listen, and be present with whom you are. Be all ears. Listen with compassion. You can end someone’s suffering just by listening deeply to them. You don’t need to solve their problems; just by being fully present, the person that is with you will feel comforted and stronger than before. Bring calmness and loving energy to every conversation you have, and you will see a totally different reaction from those with whom you interact. Emphasize the good, the positive, and the uplifting when you speak with your children, partner, friends, or colleagues at work.  Every time you open your mouth, you have the opportunity to transform who you are and the world around you. Imagine how many opportunities you have every day! Select your words carefully to be sure you don’t create discord, separation, anger, or division between groups or communities. Realize when you judge, criticize, or gossip just because you have always done it and everyone around you does it. Maybe we all should speak less and listen more. Speak mindfully. All your body speaks. How relaxed you are, how present you become, how you look at the other person, and what your eyes express, are part of what you say and how you listen. Maybe you believe that people only receive what you say, but this is not the case. Many people can read your energy. Children, especially the little ones, do it all the time. They know if you are happy or sad, stressed or calm. They may not understand the words, but they know what is in your heart. Many books have been written about body language. You can lie, but you cannot avoid your body telling the truth about your being. You have to embody what you say, or it won’t work. You cannot say: ”Darling, I Love you” if your words are empty and you are pretending. You have to feel the Love; you need to have it inside yourself to truly give it. Let’s become Love and bring it to the world. Should we practice? I’ll start: I am sending lots of Love to you. You deserve it! "Be Impeccable With Your Word. Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power
of your word in the direction of truth and Love" Don Miguel Ruiz A sense of belonging is one of humanity's most basic needs. Belonging to a tribe was essential for our ancestors because surviving alone was very challenging. We are biologically wired to want to belong. But what does it mean to belong? The Cambridge English Dictionary defines it as "a feeling of being happy or comfortable as part of a particular group and having a good relationship with the other members of the group because they welcome you and accept you." We all want to be loved and accepted and use certain mechanisms to achieve it. Some of us decide from a very early age that pleasing others is a good strategy to achieve Love. We put the needs of others before our own because we think they will Love us more if we do it. We confuse Love with self-sacrifice. We may sacrifice for such a long time that it seems like normal behavior. We Love others intensely and put everything we have, including ourselves, into showing them our Love. The consequences of people-pleasing are numerous and painful. Once we get used to caring more for others than ourselves, we abandon ourselves. In the long term, this can make us feel that others abuse us and create resentment because we realize that our needs are never met, only the needs of others. But if this is the dynamic we have established in a relationship, we may not want to or know how to change it. If we think that if we stop pleasing others, they will not Love and accept us, it will be difficult to change our way of being. We put others' needs first in many different relationships and situations.  Other people, perhaps unconsciously, decide to play small to belong to a certain group or establish a relationship. Belonging and being there is all they want. They won't risk losing their place by shining more than others. They don't have enough Love for themselves yet and feel they need to be loved by others to receive the Love they crave. The problem is that they intuitively know and feel they have more to offer to others and that they are not being authentic. But they got used to being less than others because being that way provides them with Love and safety. But this doesn't benefit them, nor those they Love, because they will never know the unique being that they are if they hide and decide never to stand out. Perfectionism is another way we try to belong and receive Love. We may feel that if we are perfect, if there is nothing to blame in our life, we will deserve to be loved and accepted. Being perfect is not possible, but we try harder and harder. We do it by trying to control the circumstances and how others feel about us. We have to make sure we don't fail; for this reason, we don't put ourselves in situations where we can look bad. We stop trying new things or avoiding anything we consider risky, because the security we seek by being perfect is more important to us. It requires lots of focus and effort to try to be perfect, and it can become a purpose. But the only meaningful life purpose is to become you, authentically you, not to have a perfect façade where you can hide. You will really feel that you belong when you know that it is your birthright and not something you need to earn. Your heart will know this moment. You will distinguish perfectly between both belongings, the one you have to acquire day by day, trying hard, demonstrating your value, and putting others first, and the real one. Belonging should feel like a calm sense that you deserve to be a member, that you qualify because of who you are, not for your merits or efforts. A calmness will come over you because you will really belong to the most extraordinary group of people, those who know what Love is about and that they themselves are the source of Love. “We may act sophisticated and worldly, but I believe we feel safest when we go inside ourselves and find home, a place where we belong and maybe the only place we really do”
Maya Angelou There are moments in life when you need radical self-care. When things accumulate, you are too busy, your calendar is full of personal and work or business matters, and you start feeling depleted, tired, stressed, or anxious, this is the time to stop and reflect on your present circumstances. It is the moment to take time for you. Time to take good care of yourself, replenish batteries and regenerate. You are not like a machine that, when the battery is low, can be connected to the power and, in a short amount of time, is restored to the original energy level. We tend to ask our bodies and minds for more than they can give. We postpone our needs, prioritize others, and sacrifice our well-being for many different reasons. I do it inadvertently with a certain frequency. I am not the one to tell you that you should stop. I want to remind you that it is your responsibility to take good care of yourself. Once you lose your health, good mood, and zest for life, it will take you more time to recover than if you stop and take some restorative measures when you observe the first signs of overdoing, fatigue, lack of joy, or burnout. Life loses its meaning when you are not feeling well emotionally, spiritually, or physically. It makes sense that this happens, but we ignore the signs repeatedly until we are in trouble, get sick, or need a long vacation to recover from all the excesses.  You will feel it. Your body will send you enough signals. You will see it in your mood and the absence of happiness. If you need to stop, do it now. Don’t procrastinate on this matter. If you don’t, life will do it for you. Usually, in a big way, at the least expected moment, when you don’t have time to stop, when you have to solve many things, when you have big plans for your life, business, or family. Life will impose order. Self-Care needs to be radical. No excuses. Nothing else is more important when you need to take care of yourself. Wouldn’t you prefer to take care of yourself now, not lose your balance, and enjoy life to the fullest? Or do you want to keep running around until your battery is so low that recharging it will take a long time? It is your choice. It seems that life pushes you in one direction, and you can only say yes to your commitments and those that keep coming. Different things may be asking for your time and energy: family members, work, children, moving homes, an illness… It doesn’t matter what it is. What is crucial is that you recognize early enough that you need to be there for yourself and take care of yourself to serve others properly. Do it because you Love yourself, because you owe it to yourself. Learn to say no when necessary. Decide what you can and cannot do. Delegate, postpone, or ask someone for help if you need it. You are not invincible. It is for you to recognize what you need. Still, if you listen deeply, you will hear a voice whispering inside yourself, asking for things like sleep, rest, silence, relaxation, clean air, proper breathing, movement of a certain kind, stretching, hydration, or a concrete kind of food… The voice communicates with you all the time, but you may not hear it in the middle of the chaos and noise of modern life. Think about how our ancestors lived. They were more in touch with nature than us; they ate food from the season and had time for conversations, music, lecture, contemplation, and walks. They lived slowly, and we don’t. I invite you to consider if slowing down may help you to take radical care of yourself. You are the most important being in the world. There is only one like you. There is no substitute for you. Don’t undervalue yourself. You deserve to be good to yourself. ”Our lives are so busy, and for many of us the demands are overwhelming. Some of us focus so much on the needs of others, we lose sight of ourselves. Stop, for one moment.
Take a deep breath. Be still. Refocus. Concentrate on improving your life. One situation at a time. You can’t be much good to others if you’re no good to yourself" Carlos Wallace I have felt powerless, and I held myself back on numerous occasions. I believe we all do at certain times in our lives. When an important decision has to be made, or life throws a big challenge at us, we can feel overwhelmed and afraid and decide, consciously or not, that we cannot face it, that we are not ready, or not capable, or that we won’t survive. See yourself in front of a serious illness diagnosis, on the brink of divorce without financial means, or wanting to leave a job you hate but that gives you the security and salary you desire. What do we do in these situations? I don’t know about you, but I take a lot of time to make decisions, especially the big ones. I have stayed in relationships where I didn’t belong anymore for too long. I have taken so much time to change my life because I wasn’t feeling powerful enough. Has this happened to you, too? Why do we do that? Why do we wait to create change, knowing intuitively that there is something better out there waiting for us? Once you have gone through the process and survived, you may look backward and ask yourself, why didn’t you change this before? But at the moment, to face that challenge felt like the end of your life and the world you knew.  There is an opportunity cost to remaining in the same situation and not embracing the power you have to change your life. But we freeze and get paralyzed due to fear, lack of resources, or the overwhelming feeling that we are not good enough to do it, whatever it means in the context of our life. The challenge can be something like standing in your power and leaving a relationship or getting divorced, finding a fulfilling job for you, or looking for a different solution to take care of yourself or a chronic illness. We freeze because it is what we have learned to do as a survival mechanism. Under stress, we tend to fight with the stressor or run away from it. Let’s say that stress is, for example, financial problems, the modern version of the lion chasing us in the savannah. What happens when you think and feel that you cannot fight because you don’t know how, you don’t have the necessary resources, and you cannot run away from it because it is evident the problem won’t go away just because you don’t want to face it? Your nervous system is paralyzed and enters survival mode. You may stop breathing normally because you want to hide, thinking that if you make yourself small or disappear, the monster going after you, the lion, the financial problems, may not find you. But time passes, and the situation gets aggravated or remains constant. A person under constant stress that is not released suffers, which creates unhappiness, more lack of power, and maybe a chronic physical condition in the body. I invite you to embrace your power as a solution to the challenges you face in any area of your life. You can do it, and you will. You may not know how, but you must trust yourself and ask for help from mortals, gods, or the Universe. Your power resides in the connection with yourself, the divine, and all that exists. Because no matter how powerless you may feel, you are powerful beyond measure. ”Everyone has inside them a piece of good news. The good news is you don't know how great you can be! How much you can Love! What you can accomplish! And what your potential is!”
Anne Frank Love is not a passing feeling that can be taken from you or something you withdraw from. Love is an energy that carries you away. If you have fallen in Love once in your life, you will surely remember the unbelievable sensation you felt. You didn't even need to be in that person's presence to feel the Love. Remembering a moment you spent together will provoke the amazing sensation of the Love you felt inside yourself. But what happens when time passes, and the honeymoon effect diminishes? Can you be in Love all your life? It seems complicated to be in Love forever in a romantic relationship because Love transforms and changes. It transforms you and the other person. It becomes more profound and changes into something that does not happen automatically. When Love deepens, and intimacy grows, you may not be in Love or feel the same adoration and passion, but you choose to share the Love you have.  There is a Love that resides within you. Nobody can take it from you because you create it. You are the one that cultivates it. With this Love you go through life with an open heart, allowing Love to flow freely and arrive to others. It is not romantic Love but True Love. It is a Love that sees the other as they are, not as you desire, imagine, or want. It is a Love that accepts and doesn't judge others. It is a Love that forgives the other person's faults, and yours. We don't have a different name to call this kind of Love, we use the same word, but it is a different concept. I can say I like you, but it does not seem good enough. I will call it appreciation instead because it adds a dimension to Love. To appreciate something, I have to see, notice, and take it into account, and then I can say that I appreciate it. It is also connected with gratefulness. I appreciate you as you are, and as a result, I feel grateful to be able to share my Love with you. Love is universal; we all have it and can share it with everything that exists. Every language has different expressions for Love. For example, in Spanish, the expression "Te quiero" could be translated as "I want you." But it doesn't matter if I say "Ti amo," "Je t'aime," or "T'estimo." What matters is that I mean what I say. Love is not a word; it is a state of being that must be shown through your actions. ”Love is a force more formidable than any other. It is invisible - it cannot be seen or measured, yet it is powerful enough to transform you in a moment”
Barbara De Angelis Have you experienced a sensation of knowing someone profoundly, but you have just met them? A feeling of familiarity with someone you just met can indicate a soul connection. You may look at a stranger in the eyes and feel totally connected to this being. You have never met, but it seems your hearts know each other. But what does all of this mean? You have a different family than the one in the flesh. You belong to a group of souls with whom you travel through lifetimes- they are your soul family. You will meet with some of these beings during this incarnation. They may serve you in so many different ways. Some beings will stay with you for a long time, and others may just cross paths with you. No matter how long the encounter is, it will be an important one. Soul Mates enter this category of soul connections, but they are not the only ones. You are connected at a soul level with people with whom you won’t establish a romantic relationship, or maybe not even a so-called relationship, because your encounter will be short but serve a good purpose in your life. Soul connections may include those beings you call friends, lovers, good colleagues, partners, and also family members.  Souls, incarnated or not, serve each other and establish agreements to help one another go through challenges and grow. A person with whom you feel a sense of affinity and have known for some time may play a significant role in your life, but a new acquaintance can do the same. It all depends on your connection. Usually, souls agree to help each other with a definite purpose once both are incarnated, but it can also be done when one soul is on the other side. A being may have talents you will need in this incarnation or may support you in a way you cannot do for yourself. These souls may appear in your life when needed without being called because there was an agreement in place from before. Some may stay in your life and support you for a long time, and others can meet you briefly, stay while needed, and then leave until your next encounter. Serving others may not be what you imagine. Suppose I have decided to increase the Love for myself in this incarnation. In that case, I might establish a relationship with someone who does it and awakens this state of being within me. But I can connect with someone who loves themselves but doesn’t invite me to do so, and I, by myself because of this experience, will learn to do it on my own. Both paths are possible. Once incarnated on Earth, souls aim for unconditional Love, but don’t live it all the time. We are learning to Love. Your connections at a soul level are vital in your path of development, and will be there to help you with different matters you have decided to resolve in this lifetime, or to share the journey of Love with you. You will distinguish them for the Love you share. It doesn’t mean the relationship is perfect, but it will undoubtedly transform your life forever. “Maybe it’s not about the length of time you’ve known someone; maybe it’s about instant recognition on an unconscious level. Our souls know each other.”
S. E. Hall You may want to change some aspect of your personality or behavior. Becoming the best you can be is a great resolution; the problem is that we usually embark on this process by judging ourselves harshly. The best way to change something is to do it for Love, Love for yourself. Do you want to quit smoking or start exercising? Do you want to be healthier or lose some pounds? Do you want to be kinder or less frustrated? Any of these changes require that you Love yourself more than you do right now. A good beginning for achieving change is to accept the situation you are in, and yourself as you are. A sense of acceptance also means that you don’t reject yourself because you are not the way you want to be or your life doesn’t look like you expected. Choose to change because you want to, because it is good for you. Don’t do it by denying Love for yourself or torturing yourself. If you don’t feel like changing anything right now, don’t do it. Be free to choose. Be patient and honest with yourself. Don’t create an inner war. Forgiving yourself allows you to start from scratch in this changing process. Maybe you have tried to change the same thing several times, and you failed. Then you face the challenge of change from a deep feeling of not being capable, which won’t help you. Let’s start with a clean slate. This is a new situation, and you are not the same person you were even yesterday. You can do things differently; you may feel more powerful now, have more resources than before, or feel more motivated and empowered after reading these lines. Changing your state of being will provoke external changes that will make it easier for you to change. One key element of changing anything in your life is to change the opinion you have about yourself. Do you see yourself as a champion, capable, intelligent, wise, and ready to face any challenge in life? That’s great news! But if you are locked into your story of failure for something you experienced in the past or that is happening now, or you feel you are not good enough, it will complicate the process.  If you blame yourself for lost opportunities, failures, mistakes, wrongdoings, and cannot let go of the idea that there is something wrong with you, it will be difficult to ever consider changing. That is the real reason we get stuck in life. Something happens to us, and we cannot move forward. It may be a divorce, being fired, losing someone you Love, or something you value. After one big hurtful event or a combination of many small experiences, we keep walking ahead, but we do it deeply wounded. We have a wound in the place that hurts the most: our worthiness, sense of importance, and uniqueness. But you can release whatever happened to you in the past. You can forgive yourself and start anew. Even the most traumatic events will be part of your story, but they won’t determine your future unless you allow it to happen. The essential part of change is to commit to loving yourself no matter what. Once you decide it, when you feel it deeply and understand how to do it, you will realize that you are more important than what holds you back from changing, and you will be ready to take action. Taking action will mean focusing on the new You you are building, in the new reality you are creating. Instead of fighting with the old You to change it, you can create a different You with new values and belief systems that support you. Imagine a new You that is understanding, compassionate, and kind to yourself—a being that always has words of Love for you and not harsh words. Whom would you be if you didn’t believe anymore that there was something wrong with you or your life? I want to meet this new You who is aware of their imperfections but accepts all of them with a smile and keeps walking through life, one step at a time, recognizing their essence of Love. The only reason to change is Love. Feel free to choose Love. When you connect with the Love inside yourself, you will be changed. "You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself. That is something you have charge of"
Jim Rohn The value you think you have determines your perception of your own worth. People believe that their value is based on their accomplishments and all they have achieved. But self-worth shouldn’t be measured in external things but in who you are. There is nothing you need to do or be to be worthy. You are worthy because you exist, because you are yourself. Feeling worthy is connected with knowing who you are and owning your gifts and talents. Nobody can take your worth away except yourself. What you think about yourself determines your importance, independently of what others believe you are capable of or what you can have or do. We often seek approval or validation from others to create an opinion about ourselves. We struggle to believe that we are worthy because we rely on what others think, or on the rules society imposes, more than on what we feel about ourselves. We look outside to see if we fit and how valuable we are. If others have more, we are less. If we have more, it seems we are doing ok. When you compare yourself with others, you may think you are less than them or not good enough. The root cause of this can be a lack of acceptance of who you are. Maybe you are judging yourself so hard because of the expectations you have set. The non-accomplished plans can make you feel that you haven’t arrived at the point you wanted to be in life. As a result, you are less than you wanted to be, which provokes enormous suffering.  Lack of money, education, status, relationships, or opportunities doesn’t make you less worthy. But what you think about yourself and your shortcomings affects your perception of your worth. If you don’t know who you really are and what you bring to the world with your presence, it will be difficult for you to understand how valuable you are. The cultivation of appreciation for yourself, just for who you are, will make it easier to understand your worth as a being. Maybe you are thinking, “What am I worthy of?” You are worthy of Love, abundance, freedom, opportunities, and much more. You are worthy of enjoying life. We try to earn Love and worthiness by giving. The less worthy we feel, the more we focus on giving. There has to be a balance between giving and receiving. Feeling worthy means opening your doors to receive what you deserve, what you feel can be yours. Get ready for that. Focus on welcoming and celebrating what you feel worthy of. Connect with what is already yours. Stop trying so hard to make things happen. Recognize your value. There is nothing to do, nothing to work on, nothing to wait for. The only necessary thing is being yourself. That’s enough. Relax. “There is nothing so rewarding as to make people realize that they are
worthwhile in this world” —Bob Anderson Every experience you have during your day is an opportunity to choose Love. How you decide to act in every moment matters. Don’t look at the big occasions; look at the small moments in your life when you react in anger, or lose your temper, when someone says or does something that triggers an instant reaction within you. When you find yourself in one of these moments, ask yourself: why am I reacting this way now? The answer might be that you are taking what the other person is saying or doing personally. But what people do is because of themselves, not because of you. Their acts or interactions with you show who they are and what they think, and have nothing to do with who you are. But throughout your life, you may have learned to take things personally and interpret the interactions with others as “things people do to me.” But they don’t really do anything to you, they do it to themselves. The other day I had an uncomfortable interaction with the person at the security desk in my building. She told me something in a bad tone; she was rude. It was late, and I was tired. My answer to her was to question why I had to do what she was asking me to. I used the same bad tone she had used to talk to me. She triggered something within me. But none of that matters. I missed an opportunity to choose Love, to answer calmly and politely to her, in a loving way. I forgot that her behavior was all about her, her bad mood, or maybe her way of being. It had nothing to do with me. Don’t look at what others do; look at what you feel when others do something. Remember that nobody is able to make you think or feel anything; only you can. Then take the time to observe what you think and feel in that moment, and ask yourself: Why am I feeling this now? It may feel challenging to do at the moment when you are in the experience, but try anyway or do it later. Become aware of what is happening within you.  When you observe yourself and become aware of your reactions without blaming others, you discover valuable things about yourself, like patterns of thought and behavior. Maybe they have always been there, but you never saw them before. You may remember similar situations you lived in the past where you were triggered in the same way, or realize that the relationship with certain kinds of people has always been challenging for you. When I asked myself why I reacted in my encounter with the security person, I noticed that it had something to do with my opinion about authority figures and the abuse of power. I also saw that I felt “less than” when she treated me in a way I considered disrespectful. It was not about her; it was about me and how I see the world and myself. She touched many things within me. But they are not reasons for not choosing peace, Love, and harmony no matter what her way of being was. Love is a state of being, not something you decide to share with some people and not with others. You are Love, and you can show it everywhere you go, at the supermarket, at work, in the post office, gym, or with your family and friends. Decide not to take things personally; do it because you Love yourself. Allow others to make their own choices. It is not your task to judge them. If you want more Love in the world, start bringing more Love into your life and those around you. Don’t ask others to be loving. Bring the Love yourself. You can say what you want to say, declare what you consider unacceptable, or set up boundaries. But do it without answering aggression with aggression, anger with anger, and unkindness with unkindness. The world we live in can be transformed if you decide to transform yourself. We are always waiting for things to change, but you are the change agent. In every moment of your life, you have a choice; always choose Love. The kind of Love that includes peace, kindness, harmony, balance, awareness, understanding, patience, and forgiveness. Choose Love in action. "The people who inspire me most are those who are willing to see the world from a loving perspective. People who perceive obstacles as opportunities and problems as
spiritual assignments. People who choose Love" Gabrielle Bernstein We all want to be loved and appreciated for who we are. We wish to establish relationships that are easy and bring amazing Love and happiness to our lives. But many times, we have problems in our relationships, and we suffer. Love becomes a complicated matter. How can we learn to Love better? By loving. Loving more and more. Love starts within yourself. The greatest Love of all, is the Love you have for yourself. The more Self-Love you cultivate, the more Love you will generate and can share with others. When you are in a relationship, you share the Love that you already have. Love is not an exchange: you give me your Love, and I give you mine. It becomes something greater when you don’t put limits or conditions on your Love, and you Love freely and abundantly. Love Yourself to avoid complications in relationships. When problems arise, it may seem difficult not to take things personally in your relationships. But the way the other person acts only demonstrates who they are, not the amount of Love of which you are worthy. It is easy to interpret what others do to you and the pain you receive as: “I don’t deserve their Love,” “There is something wrong with me,” or “I am not good enough to be loved.” The more you Love yourself, the better you will avoid relationships where there is conflict and power struggles, judgments, the need to control, or drama.  Love brings out the best in yourself. When you establish a relationship of any kind, remember that one of the purposes of relationships is that we are together to grow together. There are relationships that bring out the best of who you are. Just because you are with that person, you become a better you. These are the ones you should cultivate. You don’t have to share the same opinions about everything, but you need to respect the other person and give them enough room to grow. Look for what unites you, and don’t focus on your differences and what separates you. Love is not about solving someone else’s life. When you Love someone, you may feel the temptation of helping the other person “too much,” trying to fix their problems, saving them from their challenges, or sacrificing yourself for their wellbeing. When you do that, you are not really loving the other person; you may be controlling them. You take away their opportunities to change, grow and learn in their own way, or make their decisions. To be real, Love has to be free. It cannot be managed or strategized. It has to flow. Pay attention to yourself to discover patterns of thought or behavior that you may not have realized. For example, when you fear being abandoned, this fear can be triggered unexpectedly. If you are afraid of losing Love, you may change your behavior to be sure you please the other person and that the relationship continues. What you don’t realize is that you stop being yourself. You disappear and give your power away to be sure the other person stays in the relationship, because to receive their Love is more important than yourself. You are not free anymore; you are attached to a Love you don’t want to lose. Love is a decision you make daily. It is not a passing feeling. It is a state of being. You decide to Love. You can Love others in spite of who they are because it is your decision. You decide with whom you share your Love. You can Love the entire Universe and everything on it, including its oceans, trees, and animals, or just your loved ones. It is up to you. The more Love you share, the more you will receive. It multiplies. The Love you give will always return to you. Love is always within YOU. "We really have to understand the person we want to love. If our love is only a will to possess,
it is not love. If we only think of ourselves, if we know only our own needs and ignore the needs of the other person, we cannot love" Thich Nhat Hanh There are moments in life where you have to find the necessary strength to go through tough situations and challenges in your life. It may feel impossible to overcome something when you don’t have the energy for it, or you feel like a failure and defeated. If many things accumulate, it may seem too much for you to work it all out, and you may want to give up. We all have experienced times of crisis, faced health or relationship problems, lost someone we loved, had financial difficulties, or suffered through other major events, such as a pandemic. In those moments, you may think that everything is complicated, that life is against you, or that you are having a streak of bad luck. It is common for us to blame the circumstances, other people, or try to run away from problems. I invite you to face these times with understanding and kindness towards yourself. You are what matters the most! Don’t judge yourself for what you are going through, don’t get stuck there. You need to support yourself when all gets dark, uncomfortable, or scary. You deserve your own Love. The better you treat yourself in difficult moments, the more energy you will have to overcome them. The situation you are in is not your fault. Don’t look at yourself as the guilty party. But you are the one that can transform this situation. It is your responsibility to take care of yourself. It means you need to execute your response-ability. You are capable of choosing how to respond. You won’t be able to change what is happening, but you can answer life and the circumstances you are in the way you want. This is your life, and it is for you to decide how to live it.  There is always something you can do while living thru this stage of your life in which you are suffering. The first is accepting what is happening and having the self-honesty to see it. Look at it from a non-judgmental perspective. You cannot resolve a situation by becoming your own enemy, criticizing yourself for where you are or is not working in your life. Self-forgiveness can help you release those things in the past that you want to let go of, and set yourself free to build the life you want. Stop telling yourself that you are not capable or good enough to overcome something, and empower yourself instead. Build resilience. Observe the moment and yourself mindfully. This situation might be an opportunity to change a belief or understand your feelings by being with them. Maybe you will discover that you are stronger than you imagine. Remember other challenges you overcame and how you felt about yourself when it happened. Remember that you are always supported by the Universe, even when you feel alone or lost. You are loved as you are. Ask yourself how you can look differently at your life situation, how you can adopt a different perspective of what is happening. It will allow you to make a shift. Don’t focus only on where you are, and the present problem or pain. Look for what will come after what is happening now. Connect with the life you want to build from now on and with a beautiful future ahead. There is a new reality waiting for you, and you need to get there. You can get there at your own pace. Don’t rush or pressure yourself. Do it for yourself. You can transform your life. I believe in you, and you should too. “It’s part of life to have obstacles. It’s about overcoming obstacles;
that’s the key to happiness” Herbie Hancock Love is the powerful force that connects all of us, and all that exists. It is the reason for our existence and the energy that transforms us. How can it be more present in our lives? Love is an energy you can tap. It is not a passing feeling. It is an option you have to choose. Demonstrate your Love with your actions. Choose to respond to your life experiences with Love. Strong Love, true Love, Love with power, Love that stays present, is compassionate, and never gives up. You can start by adding more Love to the relationship with yourself. Appreciate who you are. Give yourself more hugs. The more connected you are with Love, the better you will be able to share it with those around you in the form of kindness, peacefulness, smiles, and other acts of Love. Every little Love gesture counts and adds to the total. Don’t miss any opportunity to be more loving and less critical with yourself. You can connect with the Love and experience it inside yourself as frequently as you want. It takes just a couple of minutes, and it is very rewarding. You can do this by thinking of someone you Love deeply, like your children or pet, anyone who allows you to feel Love instantly. You can also remember a loving moment you shared with someone. Be there, feel it, dive into it. Stay there enjoying the moment. Just focus on Love.  If there is something you want to change, such as a relationship that is not working, or the fact that people starve, don’t get angry, frustrated, or disappointed by the situation. Instead, add more Love into it by setting the intention that it can be resolved, that we can agree and take action to find a solution. Send your Love energetically, don’t ignore the situation. Trust that Love can affect and change it. Your Love can transform the world. This is how powerful Love is. The way you live and lead with Love will touch others, creating a more loving world. Tune into the Love that exists. There is Love around you. If you pay attention, you will see it and feel it. A family sharing a meal, a kid’s hug to a parent, a couple’s kiss of Love, a big smile someone offers you in a shop, the waiter that takes care of you lovingly in a restaurant, a colleague that provides a helping hand, a friend’s invitation for dinner... Look around and you will see a different world, one where Love is present and alive. A planet where Love exists and heals the wounds we have. Becoming more loving every day is up to you. Nothing has to change for you to do it. It all depends on you. Don’t wait until Love appears in your life; show your Love and more Love will arrive into your life. "Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier."
Mother Teresa For some people, it is easier to give than to receive. We receive many instructions about how important it is to give during our education and in our culture. Good people Love and give to others is a message imprinted in our minds. We have many opportunities for giving, for being there when others need us, volunteering, checking on others, helping not only those you Love but everyone. And you get something out of it as well; it makes you feel great. It is so rewarding to serve others, to give, to offer what you have. Maybe nobody has explained to you that it is equally important to receive gracefully. We cannot only emphasize giving and forget the other end. Never put conditions to the Love you receive. Accept it with an open heart and be grateful for it. If something arrives to you it is because you deserve it. Be ready to receive without feeling that you have to give something in return. It is time to receive! You cannot receive what you don’t believe can be yours. Feeling unworthy of something guarantees that you cannot have it, and you may even reject it. Someone may offer you their Love and care, but you cannot accept or feel it because you don’t think you deserve it. Love is real when there is a flow of giving and receiving, when balance exists. We know how to Love, it is natural, but we often put limits to the Love we receive from others, stopping it from getting to us.  You are a precious gift. Your uniqueness makes you special. Share yourself. Give yourself to others. Show the world who you are. Express your gifts. Don’t hide thinking that you are not good enough to be seen for who you are. You are not just one more human being. There is only one like you. Share your Love, smile, hugs, laughter, conversation, insights, compassion, your sense of humor. Give all of who you are and see what comes back to you. We also have to learn how to give to ourselves. We, inadvertently, may put ourselves last on our list. We keep giving until we are depleted. This Love, care, time, and attention you give to others, turn it in on yourself. Do it because you Love yourself. You deserve your own Love. You need the understanding and nurturing you offer to everyone. Devote time to know what you need and give it to you. I lost myself in relationships where I thought I had to give and give more to keep the relationship alive. I abandoned myself to nurture others. Now I know that it doesn’t work to give in this way. There has to be balance. There are moments to give, and it is so pleasurable to do it. But Love is not sacrificing. We need to replenish our batteries before they are empty, or we won’t be able to continue giving. In Love, we support others, but we need to support ourselves and be supported as well. Live and give Love, and open yourself to receiving it. "He had always known that to truly receive, you had to give. Now he understood the equal truth: that to be able to give with a whole heart you had to be prepared to receive in turn”
Elizabeth Rolls Have you asked yourself what stops you from creating the life you would Love to live? Maybe you have felt that on one side you have your dreams and desires, and on the other, there seems to be a force that holds you back from achieving them. There may be many different reasons why your life doesn’t look the way you want, but you are the most important one. Are you saying no to opportunities and changes that can improve your life? Maybe you do it unconsciously because you are afraid or don’t feel ready for a challenge. Perhaps because the routine in your life has taken over, you don’t look for anything different and have accommodated to what every day brings. You are a powerful being and a creator. I want to invite you to connect with your inner courage, to recover your old dreams, to find the necessary confidence to live life on your own terms. I know you can do it! Start today. Just a small step can give you the energy you need to continue. Do something that will take you nearer to where you want to be. Maybe you have stopped believing in yourself. It happens when one feels like a failure, when you lose your confidence, when a challenge seems too big. Because of the accumulation of life situations we encounter, you may have adopted the idea that you cannot change your life, that you are not capable. Find out what you think of yourself and transform what doesn’t serve you.  A long time ago, you may have arrived at certain conclusions about who you are, and you have even forgotten the reason you have these opinions. But who told you they are true? It is an opinion, and it can be changed. As a consequence of these beliefs, you may take actions that go against yourself. For example, constantly procrastinating, starting something and giving up, or blaming the circumstances or other people. It is important to discover the beliefs that you have about yourself. Words you heard in the past or during your childhood, from any of the authority figures important for you, may still be totally present. They can influence the ideas that you have about what you can or cannot do. Identify and let them go. They are stories of the past. If you change your ideas about yourself, you will change the future you create. Look at the conversations you have in your mind and see if there is enough appreciation for who you are. You are an amazing being. Allow yourself to shine. Can you see yourself as an important person that deserves happiness and fulfillment? I am sure you can. You need to start looking at yourself with more Love, care, and kindness, through compassionate eyes. What other people think about you it is not your business. You can release others’ opinions about you. Give yourself permission to be you. Discover how amazing you are. Go inside and see all the beauty and Love within. Don’t look only at your flaws and wounds. Focus on your worth as your birthright. It is constant. You can never lose it. It is yours independently of your accomplishments in life. You are free to be. This is your life. It is yours to make. “Lead a life of your own design, on your own terms. Not one that others
or the environment have scripted for you” Tony Robbins Love is always available. It never disappears or hides. You may forget that it is waiting for you to connect with, and that it is always around you, even when you don't consciously feel it. I'm not just talking about romantic Love, but Love for everything that exists. If you want to, you can have a heart-based connection with the world. You can focus on expanding your Love, compassion, and kindness. This will provoke an instant shift in the planet's energy, not only on you and those with whom you share your life. It seems that Love resides in your heart, the center of your power and existence. Your energetic center and source of vital energy. But Love, as an energy, can be everywhere simultaneously and travels without boundaries or any means of transportation. You can send Love to anyone you want, and the only thing you need is your intention. It will arrive safely and instantly, and it will be received by the person or group of people you have sent it to. We feel Love and all human emotions and deep sensations in that area of our body we call the heart. It helps to know that there is a physical location where you can go to connect with the Love you feel.  You can use this simple practice whenever you want to connect with Love. Put your hand in your heart and feel the Love inside of yourself. It is a force that resides within you. Be still in your heart. Allow Love to expand around your whole body, touching every particle of it. Now you are full of Love. Imagine that Love surrounds you as well, like a bubble. Imagine that your heart has doors, and they open up, allowing your Love to go out, filling the room where you are and everything it touches. And finally, your Love travels out of your home and into the world, and it is shared with everyone and everything. It is good for you to connect with Love regularly. It is important to maintain our hearts open, since certain events or disappointments can make us feel not loved or that our heart is broken. Sometimes we may feel that our heart is closed. That we cannot share and receive Love. We may feel disconnected from others, alone, or flooded by sadness. It is as if the point of connection were broken, and we cannot open our heart to Love again. We may be afraid of suffering and decide to ignore Love, but it doesn't work. Love will knock at your door again and again. You cannot live without it, because it is the reason why you are alive. It is what makes life worth living. It is the energy that connects us all. Choose to bring more Love to every encounter you have. Love without a reason. Love freely. Love because you want to. Love is more than a passing feeling or an intense emotion. It can be your state of being if you decide to make it so. "Love is not only something you feel, it is something you do"
David Wilkerson We experience many things every day. We accumulate thoughts and feelings, and frequently we don’t invest time in understanding and letting them go. We live fast. There is no time for going inwards. Life continues. This is the way we act until we enter into a crisis, and we have to stop. It can happen in the form of an accident, illness, loss, financial problem, a relationship issue, or disconnection from ourselves. If you don’t stop, life will stop you. It is necessary to devote time to heal your experiences, all of them. To process what happened to you. To find a way to release or forgive a situation or event. It is not a good idea to suppress what you feel, ignore it, or blame others for the situations you are involved in. You are here to learn something from every little thing that happens to you. Don’t ruminate over a problem or issue; take what you have learned with you and continue living. Don’t allow yourself to get stuck in the same patterns or ways of reacting to life. Observe yourself. When your body gives you signs of discomfort, unexpected pain, or lack of energy, don’t wait until you feel sick or in pain. Pause, and take a break. Take care of yourself. Allow yourself to do nothing for some hours. Find the time to heal now. Listen to what your body is trying to tell you. Don’t pressure yourself to be well. Just be with what is happening. Every illness has a deep meaning at a soul level. Be on the side of your body and Love it, instead of thinking about why it is not working properly. Your body wants to be healthy. What can you do to help? Or what can you stop doing to help your body return to wellbeing?  Time is the key element. I am not talking about time in hours and days, but more about an internal time where you listen to what is happening inside you. We ask others how they are very frequently, why not do the same with ourselves. Check in with yourself. Not in a judgmental way. Find time to be with yourself, your wounds, your incomplete business, your unhealed relationships, or whatever you are feeling right now. We don’t allow ourselves enough time to charge batteries, to reconnect with ourselves and our inner world. We want to continue with our lives immediately, but things are resolved at the right time, not when we want. Don’t take the easy path of getting busy and not having time to feel or release. It only will help you postpone the inevitable. Later on, you will have to confront what you abandoned along the way. All those things you have accumulated won’t disappear from your life just because you postpone dealing with them for long enough. They dissolve when you confront them and consciously decide to be with them, feel them, understand them, take responsibility for them, release them, forgive those involved, including yourself, and set yourself free to move on and start anew. We want to resolve it all quickly. I know because I have been there as well. I do many things, and ask and ask more of myself until I realize that I have forgotten to cultivate my inner peace and how to feel good with myself. Don’t take your life, health, or relationships for granted. Give thanks for everything you have. Gratefulness is the secret of life. You have received the gift of life. Stop, feel, and live. And when the moment arrives, take the time to heal. "Healing may not be so much about getting better, as about letting go of everything that isn’t you — all of the expectations, all of the beliefs — and becoming who you are"
Rachel Naomi Remen We tend to look at ourselves with critical eyes. When we want to change any aspect of our lives or ourselves, we do it from a perspective of not being good enough, obligation, pressure, or because we dislike ourselves. Often, we are judgmental and very strict with ourselves, trying to change things by working harder, sacrificing more, and suffering. I propose a different plan. Look at yourself with a sense of appreciation. Recognize your value. Observe yourself through loving eyes. Look at what is happening inside you. Just look without judgment, and try to understand who you are, what you think and feel, why you do or don’t do things, or what makes you react. Discover yourself. We judge reality as well. Pay attention to how many times per day you complain when reality doesn’t fit with the concept you have of it, or things don’t go the way you want. Observe what makes you feel frustration or sadness, what things take you out of balance or put you in a bad mood. Look at all this material with curiosity and understanding. Don’t be hard on yourself for being where you are or what you consider mistakes, flaws, imperfections, or faults. Be there, totally, without complaining or judging the world around or inside you.  Let’s suppose that you are trying to help someone who is having health problems. You know that they can do more to get better, and you would like this person to take responsibility for their health, but it is not what is happening. You are supportive, patient, caring, and loving, until a moment when, unexpectedly, you explode for a little thing. At that moment, you tell this person that they have to change their behavior and put more effort into healing, that you are not going to witness this anymore. You speak to this person with an angry tone and are very distant from the Love you feel for her. Something happened within you. If you look at yourself, you will see what triggered you, why you reacted and created a scene, how much emotion you have accumulated, your fear of losing this person you Love in action, the need to express your feelings, the frustration and powerlessness you have been hiding, and more. If you observe what is going on within you, you will learn so much about yourself and how you go through life. That’s the important thing here. To understand yourself a bit more every day. If you react, get angry and lose your temper, it is okay. You are human. You can forgive yourself, release whatever happened, apologize if you want to, or let it go and continue with your life. But pay attention, because I can assure you that a similar event will happen to you very soon. If you have learned from the last experience, things may unfold differently. If not, you may end up reacting the same way. Life will give you many opportunities to learn and practice. Suspending the need to react will offer you time to observe yourself and choose your response. Observe your thoughts rising, your emotions in full action, you showing to yourself what you are experiencing at that exact moment. Why is this important? Because if you can see it, and it is not the experience you want to have, you can do something about it. Once you are aware, you can decide. You have the power to choose. You can take a breath and observe yourself in any situation you experience. This will allow you to become a different you. You may not have control over the feelings you experience, but you can always choose how you respond to life and its events. An instant reaction may be something you have learned, a pattern. You can change It with a little bit of awareness and practice. But only if you realize that you have the power to do it. Only if you observe with compassion and understanding what is happening within you, catch yourself when you react, and choose to be more loving, understanding, and patient with yourself and others. "The best way to capture moments is to pay attention. This is how we cultivate mindfulness"
Jon Kabat-Zinn Being with yourself means spending time in your own company. It is becoming aware of what is happening within yourself, internally, and not only around yourself. You have a world inside that you may not have discovered yet. If you pay attention, you will distinguish more than thoughts in your mind or sensations in your body. You will be able to receive messages, guidance, helpful information, and become more aligned and balanced. It is difficult to spend time with someone you dislike. Sometimes we run away from ourselves for this reason. If you don’t have a good opinion of yourself and your life, it may not sound like a good plan to hang out with yourself. A good beginning will be to look at yourself with new eyes and from a different perspective. It is necessary that you appreciate your gifts more than your flaws. Judgmental thoughts and not being able to forgive yourself can be the reason why it is difficult to feel connected to and good about yourself. When you are with someone you Love, you pay attention to their likes and dislikes, needs and desires, what they say, and their body language. You look into the eyes of the person. You are present, totally there. But what do you do when you are with yourself? You forget you exist most of the time. You don’t take good care of yourself because other things or people are priorities, you don’t listen to your body and its messages or red flags, you ignore what your feelings are trying to say… In summary: You treat those you Love better than you treat yourself.  The poet Rumi asked in one of his works: do you make regular visits to yourself? It is an important question because we tend to forget that we need to be in a good relationship with ourselves. This is the most important relationship you will ever establish. These visits may consist of a silent walk, a time to reflect, journal or write, meditate, or ask yourself questions. The activity doesn’t really matter, it is about devoting time to you and your inner sacred center or essence. In recent studies, scientists have detected that most of the time we are not present where we are. Our mind wanders. It is the way it is. But what you have to know is that we can train the mind to wander less and be more present in the activity or moment where we are now. It doesn’t require extensive training, just to pay attention, more at the beginning, until you know how to be more in the present than in the past or future. It is easier than you think, and the benefits of being with yourself in the present are enormous. I invite you to try. Don’t waste more time. You are invited to a special party. It is called Me and I. You are the only one invited. It is an opportunity to know yourself better. You are going to have a great time if you want to. Drop any expectations. Go there with an open heart and a Love Letter written to yourself. You can’t miss this opportunity of being intimate with yourself. Love yourself for no reason. You deserve your Love. Don’t look at what is missing or what you would like to be. Focus on becoming just you. Appreciate what you have and who you are now. Be proud of yourself and your accomplishments. I am sure you are unique, and there is only one like you. I Love you as you are. "Sometimes you just have to turn off the lights, sit in the dark,
and see what happens inside of you" Adam Oakley We are the ones that should recognize our value, gifts, talents, and who we are, but we tend to look for recognition and a pat on the back from others. If you only consider yourself important when someone tells you that you are, or when you have accomplished what you wanted, or overcome a challenge, something is missing. You need to be your number one fan, your cheerleader, your best friend. You have to take care of yourself as if you were a child who needs your support. Take care of yourself, be kind and see all the good things you bring to the world daily. Yes, you do bring things to the world, even if you are unaware of it. It is challenging to have a good relationship with yourself if you suffer from self-pressure and stress yourself to perform all your tasks perfectly. It is ok to do your best. Don’t be so strict and difficult with yourself! Embody fierce compassion towards yourself instead. You are not here to be perfect or to do things. You were created to be you. Appreciate yourself just because you exist. Your creation was a divine act. Life is a gift you can never take for granted. Look for little moments to remind yourself: Wow! I am alive. I exist. Life has been given to me. Connect with everything around you. Look at the sky, the clouds, the trees you see through the window of your home or office or while you walk in the street, and remind yourself that life is a miracle.  Every baby step you take towards any of your dreams should be celebrated. Life is a collection of moments, a continuous present. Don’t wait until you finish a task or accomplish something. Look at the step-by-step process as a source of joy. Be sure you enjoy life. Try not to go on autopilot and don’t allow days to go by, waiting for something better to arrive. Live now! Be content with what is, start where you are. Celebrate life. You can create new circumstances at any moment. Your life can change for good in the next instant. You don’t have to live the same life day after day. Ask yourself questions. What things would you like to change? What attachments don’t allow you to move forward? What relationships do you want to strengthen or abandon? What are you afraid of? Ask for help. Ask what you need from the Universe. Trust yourself and your capabilities to be a co-creator of your life. Whatever you want exists out there. Do you want more Love? Abundance? Time? Health? Everything is waiting for you in the field of opportunities and it is available for you. Never deny yourself what is your birthright. Live to the fullest. There is no need for a crisis or facing an illness to realize that you matter and your happiness is essential. You exist for a reason. You and only you can be yourself. Whatever you decide to do with your life will affect all that exists on Earth and the Universe. We are all connected and influence each other energetically. You are not alone. We are all One. “You are wonderful. Valuable. Worthwhile. Lovable. Not because others think so.
Self-worth comes from only one place: self” Karen Salmansohn We as mortals think that all is over when someone passes away, but it is not the truth. You are eternal, and your Love is eternal as well. What connects us with the rest of the world is the energy that we call Love. And Love never disappears, even when the other person is not present in your life in bone and flesh. We connect not only in families and through Love bonds in the flesh, but in Soul families and Soul connections, as Soul Mates do lifetime after lifetime. I have researched the journey of the souls, I have been trained by Brian Weiss in past life regression therapy, and I have studied my own journey as a soul. I can tell you that no matter where you are, here or in a different realm, Love connects you with your loved ones. My heart is aching today. My father-in-law passed away in India, being near 100 years old. He is in a place where having a body is not necessary. He is returning to the essence of Love. He is meeting with his loved ones. Not in the flesh, as a human being, just as a being, energetically. We don’t have a total understanding of what happens when we “die.” I write it in brackets because there is not such a thing as death. It is just a transition to a different realm. A journey to a better place.  Those who remain on Earth, grieving their lost ones, suffer a lot. We had a year of losses and death on Earth. All seems to be collapsing around us, but I say NO. I invite you to embrace life and to keep loving, even when loss happens, even when you are in pain. Those who have left Earth look at you from other realms hoping you keep living your life to the fullest. There is no separation between one world and another. You don’t need a medium to communicate with the deceased. You can do it yourself because the line that connects you is the Love you shared. Grieve, cry, get mad if you want to, but don’t get stuck in pain. Those who left Earth want the best for you. A loved one has never abandoned you. It is a human illusion. You are still all together, but not in the same way. They take care of you even from a distance, from a different realm. Ask your loved ones, those you have lost, for a sign, tell them to visit you in your dreams, have a conversation (in your imagination if you want) with them, or write a Love Letter to them if you have unsaid thoughts to declare. You can be reunited through Love. You will always be together in your heart because Love is eternal. If you want to work privately with me, call me at +1-646-204-4535 (WhatsApp), or send me an email at judithmcosta@hotmail.com. “When we understand the illusory nature of life and the profound power of eternal love, which enables us to create miracles and experience the presence of our deceased loved ones,
we find ourselves living with joy, hope and peace.” Susan Barbara Apollon I have realized that the primary cause of suffering is that we accumulate unresolved issues, rejected feelings, problems that we never overcame, misunderstandings with others, or pain from relationships that didn’t work out. We carry all of that with us. Most people don’t know how to let go, release or forgive; but these concepts allow us to live more freely and happily. If you are able to observe, mindfully, every one of your feelings when they appear, accepting them, by mindful observation, you will be in touch with what you feel. Just breathe and feel what you feel. You are not your fear, sadness, or despair. But the feeling takes you over and makes you feel one with it. But understand that its message has to be loud, or you won’t pay attention. When fear, anger, or anxiety appear, don’t fight them. Instead, say, hello fear! Or hello, anger! Why are you here? If what we feel is unpleasant, we tend to reject the feeling. We want it to disappear; the sooner the better. We don’t take the time to feel it and be with it. If it lasts, we practice evasion. We run away from it, distracting ourselves with food, alcohol, watching TV, shopping, or getting busy in any other way. But the feeling won’t go away because it has not been felt. We just put it in a closet in our heart and try to forget that it is there, in stock.  But you can transform any feeling into something else. Get the message of the emotion, be with it, and take it to the next level. For example, when someone is mean to you, and you get angry because of it, you have two problems: the anger you received and the anger you feel now as a result. What if you take that anger and transform it into understanding about the person or situation? Consider that maybe this person is full of anger that they don’t know how to release. What happened wasn’t personal. You just happened to be with that person when the anger hidden in the closet of their heart became too great and had to be released. Or maybe the person is in pain, sick, or very afraid, and they don’t know what to do with their feelings. Would you be more understanding if you knew the situation in their life that is causing the pain that created that state of anger? This way, you can transform anger into understanding. Forgiveness is an unknown concept. Most people have the idea that in order to forgive you need to forget that certain events happened, accept the pain, and tell the person who hurt you ‘I forgive you’ because I am a good person and I shouldn’t hate you anymore. But this is not the forgiveness I am talking about. To forgive someone or something is to set yourself free from it. Since the moment you forgive yourself or others, you disconnect energetically from the event or situation. You have released it. It is that simple. Forgiveness has nothing to do with the other person. It is only about you. It is not about forgiving an event or suffering created by another person. The event is just an experience. You survived it, and now it is part of your story. It only matters in the present moment if you decide that it does. When you forgive, you don’t forget or condone. You choose to live freely in the present moment where you can create the life you desire, not in the past, where those events happened. Letting go of something that has been part of your identity for a long time can be scary. If I have been a victim because something terrible happened to me and I have lived in anger, pain, or sadness for years, I may not know who I will be without that anger or despair. Maybe you are thinking, “How can I be happy when this happened to me?” You can, because you choose to. The most devastating situation, the loss of a loved one, an illness, abuse, betrayal, poverty… is just that, a situation that created certain feelings. And they can be transformed. You can heal yourself from all of it. Let them go. Only you can do it. Are you ready? If you want to work privately with me on releasing and forgiving, send me an email at judithmcosta@hotmail.com. "In the process of letting go, you will lose many things from the past,
but you will find yourself" Deepak Chopra |
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Judith Costa is a Life and Love Coach, Seminar Leader, Writer and Speaker. She has a Masters degree in Psychology & Psychotherapy and an MBA. She helps her clients to overcome their blocks to Love, to Love themselves and to manifest the relationship they want. Archives
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