We have the tendency to become attached to people, a style of life, or a culture. When change arrives, we don't want to let go of what is known, and makes us feel secure and comfortable. But change is an unavoidable part of life. How are you going to grow if you don't allow your body to change, your cells to duplicate, your mind to develop? The same happens with your attitudes toward life, your belief system and your patterns of thought. They need to be updated from time to time.
The Universe will give you opportunities to become detached, to observe from a distance your life in this moment, in order to be able to create a new one. It happens when you are going to be a parent for the first time, for example. You don't know exactly what to expect, but in your mind there are a lot of ideas of what is going to happen. You have created a new world with your imagination, but the baby is not born yet.
But there are moments during our lives when you will need to practice neutrality and detachment, maybe towards the situation in your country, or how your parents, siblings, or children are managing a challenging situation, or when you have a health issue, and you need to decide what would be the best way to proceed in order to heal yourself.
You will be challenged again and again, until you learn non-attachment and neutrality. It does not mean that you stop caring, being compassionate or empathic. What it means is that you can observe anything that is happening to you, or around you, with a mindful attitude of detachment. As if it is happening to someone else, looking at it as an observer. When you do that you can be more objective, calm, and decide with wisdom what you need to do, or stop doing, in order to go through the life situation you are in. Give it a try next time you are in a challenging situation. Just observe it, don't try to resolve it. Look at it from different perspectives, be detached, and not involved for a moment.
"Why is this important?" you may be asking yourself. It is a key skill to develop because attachment is what provokes the most suffering in your life. Attachment to things that are good, and others that are not so good. Addictive behavior, being in relationships that are abusive, allowing others to mistreat you, not leaving a job you hate... all of these situations are related to attachment and a lack of Self-Love. If you want to be happy, truly joyful, allow life to guide you, don't become attached to anything, but Love everything.
"Attachment is the great fabricator of illusions; reality can be attained only by someone who is detached"
Judith Costa is a Life and Love Coach, Seminar Leader, Writer and Speaker. She has a Masters degree in Psychology & Psychotherapy and an MBA. She helps her clients to overcome their blocks to Love, to Love themselves and to manifest the relationship they want.